Civility

[ironhat]

After Chris's post on civility I got to thinking about an incident while driving this past weekend. I was the second car in line, stopped a traffic control light (yeees, it was red). When it turned green it was obvious that the fella in front of me was busy looking down at something so I gave a quick, "toot - toot", on the horn. He snapped up and looked in the rear-view and indicated that I was #1 in his book and began moving at the speed of a snail. He kept looking and swerving around the road to block me (unnecessary since we were on a busy, 2 lane road and there was traffic in both directions). He was obviously trying to get me perturbed.

So, what the heck can we do now that won't raise the ire of people? It used to be understood that a couple of quick toots was just a reminder but laying on the horn was an angry message! Geez, and this isn't the first time. I had a guy chasing me down the road (interstate) at high speeds one time because I passed him. That's all it took! WTHeck?!

What's your take on today's hypersensitivity?

[LCHIEN]

being in a car sometimes brings out the worst in people.
Same thing happened to me before. If I were not paying attention and blocked people at a light I would be profusely apologetic.
There are some lights around here at busy intersections where the turn lights are real short - 2-3 cars at the most if everyone is awake. Usually the guy in front of me is real slow towake up and runs a very stale yellow, Ha, leaving me stuck at the light.

[Richard in Smithville]

Some people seem to think that they are the only ones on the road. I find myself pretty forgiving of other drivers -mostly. I have very little time for the drivers who I mentioned above. Saving grace on this is I still find more drivers who are respectful of their hwy neighbours than not.

[ironhat]

Yea, RIchard,I guess you're right. The few bad apples kind of over-ride the good folks. Ya know, when I get cut off or some other thing that could set me off I don't ever look at the other guy. Maybe it's a bit of paying it forward but if I don't react then maybe just maybe, they will think about that and be more inclined to be forgiving.

[Stytooner]

It's all in your own state of mind I think. I used to get mad at other drivers a lot when younger, but I find if I can find the humor in how much of dingaling the other person is proving itself to be, I am much better off.

When someone gives me a light handed wave by forgetting to raise all their fingers, I just smile at them and give a full wave like Gomer Pyle.
Sometimes I get a smile or two in return, but usually from other drivers that saw what happened.

[cabinetman]

With some drivers, it doesn't take much to tee them off. The response to the "toot toot" could have been a reactive emotion for being "caught", not a response to you being impatient.

With the way things are these days they could have guns and might not hesitate to shoot, or at the least create a traffic situation, which could turn deadly. Just letting that #1 car just sit there could be a solution. I do the "toot toot" also. Not too long ago I was on my way to HD, and behind one of those guys who decided to rearrange his glove box while talking on the phone. So, I gave him a "toot toot", and then passed him when it was safe. No, I did not show him his IQ with my finger. Anyway, he decided to follow me inches from my bumper.

He stayed with me all the way to HD parking lot. I thought there might be some trouble, so, I found an open place to park, where I could get out fairly quick. He pulled up behind my truck blocking it in but didn't get out. As I got out he must have evaluated the situation that I would accommodate him, and he just pulled off. Confrontations like that could lead to serious injury to either party, and the possibility of getting arrested is pretty high. It's not worth it, but at times unavoidable.
.

[Alex Franke]

I guess a warning shot over the bow probably wouldn't be very civil either...

I knew a girl in college that was a master at communicating with her horn -- she had a certain short pattern that she tapped out that was unmistakably polite and respectful... I tried it a couple of times with mixed luck, and unfortunately now I can't even remember what the pattern was...

Now when I see someone acting the way you describe, I try to remain unfazed except to silently wish the other driver a better day.

[Ed62]

As much of a temptation it is to give it right back to people like that, it could be dangerous, as C-Man pointed out. So many people carry guns today, and the hotheads just might use them.

Ed

[Pappy]

I guess I am on the other end of the spectrum here. Not so much the guy or gal that is distracted at a light since a quick beep of the horn, accompanied by a friendly wave as soon as they look up, usually works. The drivers that go 10mph under the limit, speed up to block your attempt to pass, then slow down as soon as you fall behind them again will often get a real good view of the grill on my truck.

My biggest peeve is the ones that think they are too good to get in line at a light and wait their turn so they go around stopped traffic and cut in at the front, making me later. I will not let these people cut in front of me.

[LinuxRandal]

You can't tell what kind of mood the person is in front of you already. If they are already in a bad mood, the only thing you could have done to diffuse the situation, is to look out another car window and wave at someone. Then the person in front of you may have thought you were honking elsewhere.


Your other option, is to drive to a police station or marked unit elsewhere. I have had to do that twice. Once due to a belligerent drunk driver, the other time due to someone in a bad mood that started to pull a handgun out of their glove box.

[twistsol]

Of the hundreds or thousands of drivers you shared the road with that day, one of them was a jerk. There is really nothing anyone can do that won't tick off someone, somewhere. Treat people how you want to be treated and if they're offended by it, so be it.