"Survived by his wife"

[eccentrictinkerer]

I spotted this link on a another forum.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kubH2HctFIM

Over 20 years ago, while on a trip to Las Vegas for a trade convention, LOML and I had a chance to see Alan King and Ella Fitzgerald. King did this routine and brought the house down.

Now that I'm 62 I check the obituaries more often. If my name's not there, it's going to be a good day. I often notice, while reading the obits, that no matter how old a deceased man is, he is almost always SURVIVED BY HIS WIFE!

Ella Fitzgerald was the real hit of the show, however. This was one of her last Vegas appearances and she was great. Her voice was the sweetest voice I've ever heard. She hit every note perfectly even though she was up in years.

During a beautiful rendition of "Summertime" she stopped cold and pointed at a guy sitting in front who had lit a cigar. She reminded him that the announcer had told everyone that there was to be no smoking while she was onstage (she suffered from asthma) and that she wouldn't sing another note until he left the room!

The guy slinked out of the room and the band played on!

It was a great night.

[capncarl]

Most men die before their wives do ........because they want to!

Ella sounds like and example of that.

capncarl.

[BobSch]

Good for her!

[cgallery]

I've known people that have suffered asthma so badly that it could cause panic attacks at the onset of symptoms.

So I don't blame her for calling the guy out on it.

[Uncle Cracker]

Medical studies have found that there is a simple reason that men die before their wives... self defense!

[Russianwolf]

It's amazing what we'll do to avoid the honey do list isn't it.........


Looking at is semi-scientifically. Women have a longer life expectancy than do men. Most marriages have an older husband in the mix. It's not hard to figure the math from there.

My wife is 15 years older than me.

[crokett]

My wife is 15 years older than me.

My wife is older, but not that much older. I always dated women at least a few years older than I was. they were usually more mature and I didn't have to put up with near as much folderol. For example, I do not believe my wife has ever said 'if you don't know what is wrong I'm not telling you!'. She has no problem telling me exactly how I screwed up.

[Mrs. Wallnut]

Well if the women in my family are any indication of how long I will be around then I will out live Mark by about 70 years or more. I have a great grandmother who is 104, and my grandmother is 76, and my paternal great grandmother was 103 when she passed away about9 years ago.

Plus haven't you guys heard the new Brad Paisely song "Waiting on a Woman", there is a line in there that says something to the effect that the "mans always the first to go because she wouldn't be ready", right now I can't remember the exact line.

[germdoc]

That is a great clip!

I am currently looking at women younger than me for a very selfish reason that has nothing to do with lust or ego--I want someone who will still be working when I'm ready to retire so I can have health insurance and a steady income coming in. Assuming the country's finances haven't completely collapsed by then.

I don't plan on burdening her when I'm old and decrepit. I live pretty healthy, so I should be good for another 40 years or so. Then when I start to lose it, I send her on a long cruise, pull the Kevorkian device out of the closet, and leave a voicemail for my attorney with instructions...

[RayintheUK]

Plus haven't you guys heard the new Brad Paisely song "Waiting on a Woman" ..

A more appropriate song might be Jerry Reed's "PMS, I Guess!"

Jerry was also survived by his wife (and two daughters).

Ray.

[Russianwolf]

Well if the women in my family are any indication of how long I will be around then I will out live Mark by about 70 years or more. I have a great grandmother who is 104, and my grandmother is 76, and my paternal great grandmother was 103 when she passed away about9 years ago.

)

So Mark isn't going to make it past 35 huh........

Mark...... Run....... Now.........

[Mrs. Wallnut]

So Mark isn't going to make it past 35 huh........

Mark...... Run....... Now.........

No Mark is past 35 now...what I meant to say is that he will live another 50 years and I will live past that as I am younger than he is