Did I Use "Bad Form"?

[Knottscott]

We put our family van up for sale on CL last night. Got 3 inquiries by morning, two of which resulted in early morning phone calls, and both of those showed an interest in coming to see it.

One of the interested parties was going to come from ~ 70 miles out of town tonight, and said "if it's as described, he'd be interested and could cut a check". My understanding was that he would call later this afternoon to confirm before he left. The other interested party called back around noon today and wanted to stop and see it...he looked, made a good offer, left a deposit, and the van is now considered sold pending final payment. I called the other party back to tell him it's sold...he was very upset with me for selling it...said he was counting on it, that I showed "bad form", and that I should have honored our agreement.

I'm feeling pretty bad about it right now, but the words "I'll take it", "deal" or "sold" were never uttered. I try hard to be a man of my word and honor handshake or verbal agreements and I expect other's to do the same. In a case like this, it's typically first come first served. Had the out of town party been on route, I would have given him first shot before accepting the other offer, but his trip was still tentative as far az I understood though I did understand he's was sincerely "interested". I'd like your opinions....did I show bad form here? How would you have handled it?

[JSUPreston]

Unless he told you he was buying it or definately, I would say cash in hand wins out.

[BobSch]

Unless he told you he was buying it or definately, I would say cash in hand wins out.

I agree. Had he driven the 70 miles only to find out the van had been sold out from under him, I could see some serious dissapointment. Otherwise it's first-come-first-served.

[pelligrini]

I wouldn't consider it bad form. He made no holding offer or commitment. All the statements had some sort of disclaimer, 'if, could'.

I wouldn't be too keen on taking a check either.

[LarryG]

... and said "if it's as described, he'd be interested and could cut a check".

No. Not bad form at all. If ... interested ... could. That's all pretty conditional; I don't see anything that indicates a firm offer to buy in there. Any buyer will want to verify that an item is as advertised, but if he was genuinely "counting on it" then IMO he should have been more emphatic. It is indeed first come, first served; or that other famous one about cash talks and ... you know.

When I started reading your post I thought you were going to say the guy made the trip for nothing. He should be grateful you called and saved him a tank of gas; many sellers wouldn't bother.

[pacwind3]

Money talks.
I was selling a Chevy Blazer years ago and had a kid calling that really wanted it, just give him a week or two to get the money. Not that I held it for him, but three weeks later he calls and tells me he can't get the money together.

[cgallery]

When I started reading your post I thought you were going to say the guy made the trip for nothing. He should be grateful you called and saved him a tank of gas; many sellers wouldn't bother.

My thoughts exactly!

First man with cash gets the car.

[Rand]

You didn't do anything wrong.

One thing that really jumped out me was him saying he could cut a check. Nobody takes checks for used cars. Cash or money order from a bank you recognize only.

[Knottscott]

Thanks gang....feeling better about things after reading your posts...I just needed a reality check. He was ticked off enough to call me and chew me out, and I honestly felt badly....both parties were planning to use it for some charity work.

[JSUPreston]

Nobody takes checks for used cars. Cash or money order from a bank you recognize only.

Well, I did use a check when I bought my used motorcycle a couple of weeks ago. However, I have permission from the seller, and he did know that it was a check drawn on my CC. Heck, 3.9% until paid off ain't a bad rate at all.

[footprintsinconc]

No. Not bad form at all. If ... interested ... could. That's all pretty conditional; I don't see anything that indicates a firm offer to buy in there. Any buyer will want to verify that an item is as advertised, but if he was genuinely "counting on it" then IMO he should have been more emphatic. It is indeed first come, first served; or that other famous one about cash talks and ... you know.

When I started reading your post I thought you were going to say the guy made the trip for nothing. He should be grateful you called and saved him a tank of gas; many sellers wouldn't bother.

my exact thougths. in fact, if he was going to be using it for charity, he should have been more careful with his words, and then why chew you out?

[Pappy]

Difference in the part of the country I guess but around here 70 miles isn't considered a 'trip' for a major purchase. Considering the number of Craigslist dreamers and no-shows, even on smaller items, you did nothing wrong.

[Knottscott]

.... and then why chew you out?

Once I got over the initial shock, it did enter my mind that chewing me out was "bad form". I must be getting older b/c I managed to curb my usual linebacker tendencies and just took it on the chin....in years gone by I know I would have "chewed back", then would have felt worse later....letting him vent and not doing something in return makes it easier to live with. He was obviously disappointed to start with....why make it worse?

[gjat]

Difference in the part of the country I guess but around here 70 miles isn't considered a 'trip' for a major purchase. Considering the number of Craigslist dreamers and no-shows, even on smaller items, you did nothing wrong.

Exactly! I've sold many cars and other items in the paper, as well as bought stuff. Everyone has a b.s. story to tell you why you should buy it now, or hold it for them until later. I've been on both sides enough to know what's fair and reasonable.

Wbuying or selling as private citzens, the rules and etiquette are simple:
-Money talks, b.s. walks.
-If you snooze, you lose.
-NO checks!
-Deposits are small & cash only and the item is held until a set written time or it's forfieted.

[gsmittle]

Heck, it's good form to call and save him the trip! So he's disappointed, so what? If it was that important, he would have called and headed out the door right away.

His rant was a little over the line, but you can always hang up. I think you handled the situation very well. He's probably sitting at home right now embarrassed at the way he acted.

I've called about cars before and arranged to see them after work. And more than once when I call again before I leave the car's sold. No biggie.

Ya done good.

g.