The future of air travel?

[BobSch]

Got this from a humor board. Personally, I don't see anything funny about it. You sure I can't drive to Hawaii?


In the coming days and all over the world with $134 for a barrel of fuel:

NEW AIRLINE RULES

Attendant: Welcome aboard Ala Carte Air, sir. May I see your ticket?

Passenger: Sure.

Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be $5, please!

Passenger: What for?

Attendant: For telling you where to sit.

Passenger: But I already knew where to sit.

Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat locator fee of $5.

It's the airline's new policy.

Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it.

Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not?

Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going to hear about this.

Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy. Would you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you?

Passenger: That would be swell, thanks.

Attendant: No problem. Up we go, and done! That will be $10, please.

Passenger: What?

Attendant: The airline now charges a $10 carry-on assistance fee.

Passenger: This is extortion. I won't stand for it.

Attendant: Actually, you're right, you can't stand. You need to sit, And fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate. But, first I need that $10.

Passenger: No way!

Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the air marshal. And you really don't want me to do that.

Passenger: Why not? Is he going to shoot me?

Attendant: No, but there's a $50 air-marshal hailing fee.

Passenger: Oh, all right, here, take the $10. I can't believe this.

Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you?

Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't seem to work. Can you fix it?

Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two quarters into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes.

Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air?

Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free of charge. It's the circulating air that costs 50 cents.

Passenger: I don't have any quarters. Can you make change for a dollar?

Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go!

Passenger: But you've given me only three quarters for my dollar.

Attendant: Yes, there's a change making fee of 25 cents.

Passenger: For cryin' out loud. All I have left is a lousy quarter? What the heck can I do with this?

Attendant: Hang onto it. You'll need it later for the lavatory.

[cwithboat]

Letter to the North Kisap Herald by Bob Jungst

Be careful what
you wish for
You may be familiar with the proverb, “Be careful what you wish for, you may get it.” So it goes with today’s airline industry. The public went for deregulation; the public got it. It was touted as increased competition and lower fares. We got the lower fares alright. What happened to competition? Aha! That’s a whole different ball game.
Once upon a time there was a thing called regulation. Everything was regulated. An airline could not come into existence without government approval. Fares could not be changed without government approval. All fares between A and B were the same.
Where was the competition? All that remained were dependability and service. Dependability came largely through aircraft maintenence and always having sufficient crew people to operate the aircraft. Service came through sufficient people at the ticket counters, sufficient people to answer the telephone and make reservations. Service came with free meals which we came to take for granted, free or cheap booze, free baggage (with weight limits) and the list goes on.
With a stroke of the pen the game changed. Now airlines competed on price and the war began. Bankruptcy became a weapon. You want more of this or shall I spare you the gory details? Competition is now a matter of survival. Throw in the ever increasing cost of fuel and we’re all really in deep doo-doo. You think things are ugly in the passenger cabin now? Just wait until a bunch of those people who used to check their bags try jamming their stuff into overhead bins and under seats and wherever else they think they can hide it. It’s really going to be a zoo.
Be careful what you wish for; you may get it.

Robert Jungst
Kingston

[LCHIEN]

I dread to see the day when I am on a flight where they charge for checked baggage.

Yesterday I flew on 6000 miles of flights with Continental airlines and the cabin was full except for a whole set of three seats they saved for one deadheading Pilot so he could lie down.

The overheads were full... I have their status thingey (I haven't been upgraded to 1st class for over 4 years) but it allows me to get on first and put my stuff (usually a computer case) in the overhead. All the hoi polloi start boarding and I can see thm cram the overheads full. When I stood to get it out there were two items crammed on top of it crushing my camera and computer.

Last fall I was sitting in an aisle seat and this stupid, stupid woman behind me actually dropped a suitcase on my head trying to force it into the overhead. Believe me it hurt a lot. I got whacked by the wheels as it came down. When I put stuff in the overhead my main thought is "don't drop this on anybody".

On the way over I sat next to this woman who had two large shopping bags, a suitcase and two large purses slung around her neck. And one of those dammed life-saver vest looking pillows. Te whole flight she kept her arms wrapped around those purses as she had one bag under the seat and the rest overhead, so her arms stuck out way past the armrests into my seat area. I thought there were limits on cabin baggage.

Oh, all of this was on flights with available free baggage checking. I can't wait to see what people do when they start charging...

Sorry for the rant.

[Bigbit]

Loring,

I believe it will get better. With the airlines charging for baggage, they will be much stricter on the carry-on policy so that they can enjoy the additional revenue. It will create additional confrontation, but I actually look forward to this rule.

I've already heard stories that United has gotten much tougher about their carry-on policy since they invoked the baggage charges.

[Ed62]

I don't fly, but if things keep getting more expensive for airlines to operate, they could very easily lose a lot of customers due to people driving when possible. If that happens, how long will they be in business?

Ed

[jackellis]

I think on the whole the traveling public has been better off under deregulation than they were under the old regulated model. For people who fly a lot, it hasn't been quite so good, in part because flying has replaced taking the bus, so airplanes and airports are crowded to the point where the whole experience is really unpleasant.

In 1978, I used to pay $390 to fly round-trip between Atlanta and San Francisco and $360 to LA. Last winter the Dynamo (that's my wife) and I paid less than that each to fly from San Francisco to Miami, even though fuel cost what, 5 times as much? Some airlines had great service prior to deregulation but because there was no competition, service levels varied a lot across the many airlines that were around at that time unless two carriers flew the same route. I used to love flying Delta because the crews were really great. Once Eastern went bankrupt, either Delta's service started to slide or it's customers started to resent the Delta monopoly in Atlanta because I heard lots of complaints.

If I can buy a ticket to the East Coast for under $400 round-trip, I'll be happy to pay a few dollars to check a bag. If I'm paying a thousand, I'll ask to have the fee waived. Of course I'd like to get the best price I can but I'll pay more for a non-stop flight because changing planes increases the risk of missing a connection and it takes more time (and unfortunately, I can't buy time with the money I save by making a connection).

Anyone who can afford it is spending big bucks to avoid the airlines these days by chartering an airplane, buying a jet, or buying into a fractional ownership deal. I fly my own airplane (4 seat, 175 MPH) whenever I can to Southern California and other trips under about 500 miles because while it costs me more to fly myself, it's less hassle, more comfortable, and doesn't take that much more time. I'll take a commercial flight for long distance travel but even then, I avoid taking trips if I can because it's not much fun any more unless you can fly in the front.

Ed, airlines will continue to survive, or at least some of them will. For business people in particular, it's worth a lot of money not to have to spend more time behind the wheel than they do in front of customers. there may be fewer of them and hte ones that remain may be smaller, but since our time in this world is limited, there will always be an audience for ways of getting around that save time.

[BobSch]

Loring,

I believe it will get better. With the airlines charging for baggage, they will be much stricter on the carry-on policy so that they can enjoy the additional revenue. It will create additional confrontation, but I actually look forward to this rule.

I've already heard stories that United has gotten much tougher about their carry-on policy since they invoked the baggage charges.

I wonder how they're going to handle carry-on when there's no more space in the overheads. Are they going to charge people on the spot if their carry-on has to go into checked baggage?

I can see it now: the plane is loaded, and one passenger is arguing with a flight attendant over the fifteen bucks to have his carry-on checked.

Probably end up calling the TSA and having his tazed butt dragged off the plane.

[atgcpaul]

Funny. After reading the first post, Southwest Airlines ran a commercial:

Guy sits down and there's a 25cent coin deposit use the overhead baggage,
25cents to close the blind on the window, and 25cents to recline the seat.
The tag line:

"Tired of being nickled and dimed by your airline?"

Good stuff.

Paul

[LCHIEN]

I don't fly, but if things keep getting more expensive for airlines to operate, they could very easily lose a lot of customers due to people driving when possible. If that happens, how long will they be in business?

Ed

well, you know, if you're losing $50 on each passenger you carry, you'd better reduce the number of passengers, fast.

[BobSch]

Speaking of the TSA...

http://www.ktvu.com/news/16355395/de...=fran&psp=news

You think they'd know how pepper spray works.

[herb fellows]

Be careful what
you wish for
You may be familiar with the proverb, “Be careful what you wish for, you may get it.” So it goes with today’s airline industry. The public went for deregulation; the public got it. It was touted as increased competition and lower fares. We got the lower fares alright. What happened to competition? Aha! That’s a whole different ball game.
Once upon a time there was a thing called regulation. Everything was regulated. An airline could not come into existence without government approval. Fares could not be changed without government approval. All fares between A and B were the same.
Where was the competition? All that remained were dependability and service. Dependability came largely through aircraft maintenence and always having sufficient crew people to operate the aircraft. Service came through sufficient people at the ticket counters, sufficient people to answer the telephone and make reservations. Service came with free meals which we came to take for granted, free or cheap booze, free baggage (with weight limits) and the list goes on.
With a stroke of the pen the game changed. Now airlines competed on price and the war began. Bankruptcy became a weapon. You want more of this or shall I spare you the gory details? Competition is now a matter of survival. Throw in the ever increasing cost of fuel and we’re all really in deep doo-doo. You think things are ugly in the passenger cabin now? Just wait until a bunch of those people who used to check their bags try jamming their stuff into overhead bins and under seats and wherever else they think they can hide it. It’s really going to be a zoo.
Be careful what you wish for; you may get it.

Robert Jungst
Kingston

Sad, but absolutely true. Deregulation was the death knell for the airline industry.
There are very few things that cost less now than they did 60 years ago, but airline travel is one of them. Just to survive, companies must economize in every way possible. How long before someone goes a step too far and tragedy strikes? This is not an 'if', it's a 'when'.

[herb fellows]

Loring,

I believe it will get better. With the airlines charging for baggage, they will be much stricter on the carry-on policy so that they can enjoy the additional revenue. It will create additional confrontation, but I actually look forward to this rule.

I've already heard stories that United has gotten much tougher about their carry-on policy since they invoked the baggage charges.

That's what we need, more disgruntled passengers ;-)!
The bottom line is that the airlines need more money to survive because of the fuel increases. There are 2 ways to get this increased money needed, directly and indirectly. Indirectly, raise all fares across the board. Despite the fact that fares are at a historical low point, people are tired of seeing fares go up because of fees, surcharges etc.
Directly, your baggage increases our need for more fuel, therefore you will pay more. It really is the fair way to do it, essentially charging a 'user' fee, but the repercussions from disgruntled passengers is going to be really vocal, hopefully not violent.

[jackellis]

Just as rich folks started flying rather than taking trains or busses, now they're chartering or buying private jets and bypassing the airlines altogether.

I don't think "deregulation", or more precisely, competition, is necessarily a bad thing. Competition drove prices down and allowed more people to fly. It helped businesses by making face-to-face meetings more affordable. It opened up the world to many businesses by making overseas travel easier and cheaper. But, as typically happens, some airline executives (and their high priced consultants) decided size was good and being the biggest was better.

When debating whether opening up routes to relatively unfettered competition was a good idea, you have to look at the entire period between 1978 and now. We're going to pay a lot more to fly in the future, but compared with fares from 25 years ago adjusted for inflation, we'll probably still be paying less even though jet fuel is 10 times more expensive now than it was then.

Meantime, I'm filling my penny jar so I can buy a faster airplane and cut the coast-to-coast travel time from three days to two.