Summer Classes

[DUD]

I am sure all Us Men do understand and will not need to go to class this summer. Bill


Summer Classes for Men at
THE
ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Friday, August 15th 2008
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.


Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.


Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.


Class 5
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM


Class 6
Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM


Class 7
Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.


Class 8
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined


Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.


Class 11
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined


Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.


Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.


Class 14
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

[Ed62]

My wife would like to add one. "Dirt really is........where you don't see it.

Ed

[crokett]

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays

What are ice cube trays? I have a freezer with an ice maker.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
Of course it does. I don't change it and yet it gets changed, so it must.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub

Sure. Just go outside.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--
There isn't any. The clothes are just as happy to sit on the floor until wash time.

Class 5
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
See answer regarding toilet paper.

Class 6
Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
She falls asleep pretty quickly so no problems here.

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
If I knew where the right place to look was, it wouldn't be LOST!!! Duh!

Class 8
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
No but not bringing her flowers can be.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
Real men don't get lost.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
No. That is why I drive every time.


Class 11
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Not touching this one...


Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
This one's easy - don't go in the first place.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.

I forgot what day this class was so I missed it.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
This is what grills are for.

[Mrs. Wallnut]

Those were good. I also liked Croketts answers to the classes. It had my kids wondering why I was sitting at the computer laughing at both of those posts.

[Richard in Smithville]

Some of these should be offered at the primary level so I can send my kids. That would be 1,2,4,5,and 7.