Idiots Among Us

[tuttlejr]

Be Careful Out There:

IDIOT SIGHTING :
We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two..'

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back$1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


IDIOT SIGHTING :
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

From Kingman , KS



IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.
From Kansas City



IDIOT SIGHTING :
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded,
'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.



IDIOT SIGHTING :
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS



IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.



IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.



IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississippi


STAY ALERT!

They walk among us... and the scary part is that they VOTE and
they REPRODUCE !

[Uncle Cracker]

They walk among us... and the scary part is that they VOTE and
they REPRODUCE !

The really scary part is that half of them can't tell the difference between the two... Makes for some really interesting spectacle on election day...

[CrashResq]

I've done the change thing to get even money back and been accused of trying to run a scam on the business and asked to leave!.... and I made the same comment about things being put in my luggage without my knowledge at Tulsa International Airport... TSA offices standing there was not amused... by bag was pulled and searched

[Crash2510]

once gave a fast food worker $4.45 cents for a $4.44 cent meal

confused the poor kid so bad I recieved .56 cents bad

[leehljp]

A family friend whose father was in a nursing home in Florida went to visit him. He had hamburger for lunch. Our friend told the nurse to inform the dietician that her father had been told "no red meat". A few days later, she was there and he had roast beef. She went back to the kitchen and had a talk with the person that fixed the meals. She was told: "The doctors said no red meat. Hamburger and roast beef are not red, they are brown. Ham is red."

[jhart]

It really makes one wonder just what are they being taught in our schools today? And I guess in the homes also.

[jackellis]

My wife did the power strip trick once. She has two master's degrees and was a systems programmer for IBM. I'm a better troubleshooter when it comes to these things. She has much more common sense.

I wish we'd change the voting system to use a method proposed by Nevil Shute (author of On the Beach) in his novel, "In the Wet". That's probably as much as I should say about politics.

[germdoc]

I never even try giving extra coins to get a bill back anymore. Virtually everyplace has automatic change machines these days. It confuses everyone involved, including me. (Course at my age I'm easily confused anyway...)

[JR]

Virtually everyplace has automatic change machines these days. It confuses everyone involved, including me.

You just haven't cottoned on to the proper etiquette in this modern age. It is appropriate for the clerk to stand there like an idiot waiting for you to fumble in your pocket for change, before entering the amount tendered. That way the machine can tell the clerk the correct change.

JR

ps - I gladly accumulate as much change as I can. It goes in a big pot under the bed, from which many tool purchases have been funded!

[LarryG]

Clueless cashiers are nothing new. At least 40 years ago (which means I don't really remember the following specifics exactly, but the lesson remains the same), I was in the check-out line at a lumber yard with my dad. The customer in front of us had some plywood paneling stacked on a flatbed cart, and an assortment of other stuff piled atop the sheet goods. The paneling cost in the vicinity of $5.50 per sheet, and there were 20 sheets of it. Despite this, the cashier came up with a total purchase of under $90.

The customer, trying to be honest, said, "That can't be right ... 20 sheets of paneling, at $5.50 each ... that's over $100 right there." To which the cashier jabbed her finger at her cash register and said rather haughtily, "That machine doesn't lie." The guy stared at her for a few seconds, then shrugged and wrote the check.

I think that's probably when I first formulated my policy to call an obvious error to a cashier's attention once, and only once. After that, if they insist on being stupid, it's fine by me.

[mater]

Reminds me of the locksmith that told me he was called because a man locked his keys in his trunk. Upon arriving the locksmith opened the front door of the car which was unlocked and pulled the trunk latch and it popped opened.

[Hellrazor]

I buy building products by the case or bundle to get contractors pricing. I had a genius scan 1 pipe in a bundle and charge me that for the whole bundle. I tried to explain it to him and the other person standing there. They couldn't comprehend how the single bar code couldn't be the right price..

[unknown poster]

ps - I gladly accumulate as much change as I can. It goes in a big pot under the bed, from which many tool purchases have been funded!

I have the same policy. All the change in the house goes in one jar, which I unload into the coinstar machine at the supermarket and get Amazon (or sometimes other types of) gift cards. No charge for counting the change and I get to buy more toys.

[BobSch]

My wife did the power strip trick once. She has two master's degrees and was a systems programmer for IBM.

That's beacuse it was a hardware problem.

[LCHIEN]

I went to hear a motivational speaker hired by my then employer, a couple of employers ago.
He says, how many people are in this company? Someone told him 150.
He said, if we each did 1% more work then the company productivity would go up 150%. At that point I got up and walked out. I was sitting next to the HR manager who hired him... she never asked me why. I don't know if she understood what she heard.