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Fear of Snakes
If you have an inordinate fear of snakes, do not read this without filial guidance.
Grass Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes.
Here's why…
A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a
recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to
protect them from a possible freeze.
It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in
one of the plants and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and the
wife saw it go under the sofa.
She let out a very loud scream. The husband (who was taking a
shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was.
She told him there was a snake under the sofa.
He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it.
About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He
thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the
floor.
His wife thought he had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told
him to lie still and called an ambulance.
The attendants rushed in, wouldn't listen to his protests and loaded
him on the stretcher and started carrying him out.
About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the
Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the
stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the
hospital.
The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she
called on a neighbor man.
He volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a
rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it
was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief. But
while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt
the snake wriggling around. She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed
back under the sofa. The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed
out, tried to use CPR to revive her.
The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the
grocery store saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed
her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking
him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.
The noise woke the woman from her faint and she saw her neighbor
lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that
he had been bitten by the snake. She went to the kitchen and got a small
bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.
By now the police had arrived. They saw the unconscious man, smelled
the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were
about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all
happened over a little green snake. The police called an ambulance,
which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.
The little snake again crawled out from under the sofa. One of the
policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and hit the
leg of the end table. The table fell over and the lamp on it shattered
and as the bulb broke it started a fire in the drapes. The other
policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into
the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced
into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed
into the parked police car.
Meanwhile, the burning drapes, were seen by the neighbors who called
the fire department The firemen had started raising the fire truck
ladder when they were halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore
out the overhead wires and put out the electricity and disconnected the
telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house
fire out).
Time passed!
Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired,
the dog came home, the police acquired a new car, and all was right
with their world.
A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a
cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they
should bring in their plants for the night.
That's when he shot her.
Grass Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes.
Here's why…
A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a
recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to
protect them from a possible freeze.
It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in
one of the plants and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and the
wife saw it go under the sofa.
She let out a very loud scream. The husband (who was taking a
shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was.
She told him there was a snake under the sofa.
He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it.
About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He
thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the
floor.
His wife thought he had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told
him to lie still and called an ambulance.
The attendants rushed in, wouldn't listen to his protests and loaded
him on the stretcher and started carrying him out.
About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the
Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the
stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the
hospital.
The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she
called on a neighbor man.
He volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a
rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it
was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief. But
while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt
the snake wriggling around. She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed
back under the sofa. The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed
out, tried to use CPR to revive her.
The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the
grocery store saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed
her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking
him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.
The noise woke the woman from her faint and she saw her neighbor
lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that
he had been bitten by the snake. She went to the kitchen and got a small
bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.
By now the police had arrived. They saw the unconscious man, smelled
the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were
about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all
happened over a little green snake. The police called an ambulance,
which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.
The little snake again crawled out from under the sofa. One of the
policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and hit the
leg of the end table. The table fell over and the lamp on it shattered
and as the bulb broke it started a fire in the drapes. The other
policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into
the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced
into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed
into the parked police car.
Meanwhile, the burning drapes, were seen by the neighbors who called
the fire department The firemen had started raising the fire truck
ladder when they were halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore
out the overhead wires and put out the electricity and disconnected the
telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house
fire out).
Time passed!
Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired,
the dog came home, the police acquired a new car, and all was right
with their world.
A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a
cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they
should bring in their plants for the night.
That's when he shot her.
That is a great one!
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