The Surgery

[DUD]

Two kids waiting for surgery. The two little kids are in a hospital,

lying on beds next to each other, outside the operating room. The first

kid leans over and asks, What are you in here for?"



The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little

nervous."

The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that one

when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give

you lots of Jell-O and ice-cream. It's a breeze."



The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?" The first kid says,

"A circumcision."

And the second kid says, "Whoa, Good luck, buddy, I had that done when I

was born... Couldn't walk for a year.

[mater]

Good one Bill.

[bigfoot]

***Off topic alert***

Ken, I took a peek at yer website, and strangely, every time I hit any of the 'home' buttons, the viewable area in the browser window got narrower and narrower. How'd you do that? Better yet, ya mebbe wanna undo that

[scorrpio]

Things You DON'T Want to Hear During Surgery

"Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."

"Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop."

"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"

"Fido! Fido! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"

"Wait a minute. If this is his spleen, then what's that?"

"Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie."

"Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."

"Oops!"

"Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"

"****, there go the lights again...."

"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. ****, the guy's got two of them."

"What do you mean you want a divorce?"

"Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!"

"Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off."

"What's this doing here?"

"I hate it when they're missing stuff in here."

"That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!"

"Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us."

"Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right?"

"OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature!"

"Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?"

"Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough."

"FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!"

"Darn! Page 147 of the manual is missing!"

[germdoc]

I hear the surgeon doesn't charge a fee for the circumcision, he only takes tips.

Bababoom...

[Wood_workur]

lmao......

[LinuxRandal]

Things You DON'T Want to Hear During Surgery

"Oops!"

I used to think that one was a joke. But after a friend heard it in surgery, I understand why they call it medical practice.