Having A Bad Day?

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  • cabinetman
    Gone but not Forgotten RIP
    • Jun 2006
    • 15216
    • So. Florida
    • Delta

    #1

    Having A Bad Day?

    Things Got Ya Down? Well Then, Consider These . . ..

    In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 am, regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the super natural.

    No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 AM Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 AM all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11:00, Pookie Johnson , the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.



    Still Having a Bad Day?

    The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.



    Still think you are having a Bad Day?

    A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.



    Are Ya OK Now? - No?

    Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty

    of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany . Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.



    What? STILL having a Bad Day?

    Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.

    It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb; he opened it and was blown to bits.

    There now, Feeling Better?

    .
  • RAFlorida
    Veteran Member
    • Apr 2008
    • 1179
    • Green Swamp in Central Florida. Gator property!
    • Ryobi BT3000

    #2
    Thanks for brightening my day!

    I've gotta print those and frame 'em; that way if my days kind of crappy, I'll read how others or doing! (I've got to remember never to open my returned mail though!!!)

    Comment

    • big tim
      Senior Member
      • Mar 2006
      • 546
      • Scarborough, Toronto,Canada
      • SawStop PCS

      #3
      Like that!

      Tim
      Sometimes my mind wanders. It's always come back though......sofar!

      Comment

      • jhart
        Veteran Member
        • Feb 2004
        • 1715
        • Minneapolis, MN, USA.
        • BT3100

        #4
        Good ones, C-man
        Joe
        "All things are difficult before they are easy"

        Comment

        • Bruce Cohen
          Veteran Member
          • May 2003
          • 2698
          • Nanuet, NY, USA.
          • BT3100

          #5
          Yo Cab,

          Now I DO feel better, even though on now on my second surgery on my ankle. Two more months in this effing cast.

          Bruce
          "Western civilization didn't make all men equal,
          Samuel Colt did"

          Comment

          • steve-norrell
            Veteran Member
            • Apr 2006
            • 1001
            • The Great Land - Alaska
            • BT3100-1

            #6
            Great stories -- I'll share them with friends when they need cheering up. Thanks for posting them. Regards, Steve

            Comment

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