I don't think it can even be a simple one or the other scenario. My parents were the most strict of any of the kids I used to hang out with. I was a pretty good kid who did a ton of rebellious and stupid stuff but nothing hurtful/significantly destructive, and I managed to avoid any interaction with the legal system. I was more or less under control through school, college, life, etc.
My sister under the exact same regime was busted drinking at school by 8th grade, and had frequent if misdemeanor level interaction with law enforcement throughout high-school and her early adult years. She did ultimately straighten up and is a useful, contributing member of society and a pretty good parent.
My brother basically always followed the line. He was almost a goodie-goodie about not going against the rules. This may be a reason why he's a good fit in the Air Force and enjoys riding around in the back of MC-130's.
Same, rules, discipline, general parenting philosophy and 3 fairly significantly different outcomes. That was all in a run of the mill, suburban, 2-parent family. If you look at more stressful environments I can easily see how you can have "bad kids" coming from folks who really are trying hard (or at least as hard as they can).
That is one of my personal pet-peeves. I cannot petition the government to be able to vote or drink at 14 regardless of if I'm working, have a complete grasp of current events, and am mature for my age. However, when it fits their mood they can argue that I should be classified as an adult for the purposes of prosecuting me for a crime.
To me it needs to be an either-or situation. Whatever the criteria are for being considered an adult either I am one or I'm not, it's not some quantum superposition of possibilities that can only be resolved after the fact. I would be okay with having some sort of variable system that allowed that transition to take place (opt in for driving, voting, drinking, etc.) somewhere between 16 and 21 (or whatever ages) but the shades-of-gray, decided-after-the-fact system we have just bugs me at the gut level (the concept of changing the rules of the game on the fly doesn't sit well).
My sister under the exact same regime was busted drinking at school by 8th grade, and had frequent if misdemeanor level interaction with law enforcement throughout high-school and her early adult years. She did ultimately straighten up and is a useful, contributing member of society and a pretty good parent.
My brother basically always followed the line. He was almost a goodie-goodie about not going against the rules. This may be a reason why he's a good fit in the Air Force and enjoys riding around in the back of MC-130's.
Same, rules, discipline, general parenting philosophy and 3 fairly significantly different outcomes. That was all in a run of the mill, suburban, 2-parent family. If you look at more stressful environments I can easily see how you can have "bad kids" coming from folks who really are trying hard (or at least as hard as they can).
That is one of my personal pet-peeves. I cannot petition the government to be able to vote or drink at 14 regardless of if I'm working, have a complete grasp of current events, and am mature for my age. However, when it fits their mood they can argue that I should be classified as an adult for the purposes of prosecuting me for a crime.
To me it needs to be an either-or situation. Whatever the criteria are for being considered an adult either I am one or I'm not, it's not some quantum superposition of possibilities that can only be resolved after the fact. I would be okay with having some sort of variable system that allowed that transition to take place (opt in for driving, voting, drinking, etc.) somewhere between 16 and 21 (or whatever ages) but the shades-of-gray, decided-after-the-fact system we have just bugs me at the gut level (the concept of changing the rules of the game on the fly doesn't sit well).
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