Last night before the ball game (Mariners/Athletics) I tuned the TV/DVR to channel 651-1 (FSNHD).
A message on the screen read “You have not purchased this channel(721)”.
This was the second time in a week that this had occurred, so I knew the drill. I simply had to call the Directv toll free line and (after the obligatory invitation in Spanish to press el numero dos) enter 721 and all would be taken care of enabling my access to the ballgame. Not so.
“Please hold someone will be with you shortly”
I switch to the standard definition channel while trying to ignore the ratty music interspersed with announcements that if I go to www.directv.com all my problems will be solved. The game has started, Ichiro gets a single, Lopez moves him to second on a grounder to the right side.
Hello? How may I help you? After the perfunctory identification prelims, I explain the reason for my call, channel 651-1 is blocked.
Please hold while I check your account. Ratty music and announcements. Mariners have scored a run, I don’t know how.
Sir, you are signed up for that channel, the game must be in blackout. I inform the lady that the game is not blacked out because it is being shown on standard definition and in addition there is a banner running across the bottom of the screen advising me to switch to channel 651-1 for HD. We have a mild argument about whether the game is blacked out.
Please push the red button on your DVR to reset it. In the background I can hear her typing on her computer keyboard. Typity,type, typiti, type.
It takes 15 minutes for the DVR to reset. No channel 651-1.
Please hold while I transfer you to the supervisor. Ratty music and announcements. This operator returns three times to tell me that the supervisor is on another line and will be with me shortly. (Later I will divine why the supervisor is on the other line for so long.) Bottom of the 2nd inning, Felix Hernandez is pitching for the Mariners and doing well. M’s 3, A’s 0.
Hello sir, I understand you have a problem with channel 651-1. The game must be blacked out. We have a mild argument about whether the game is blacked out.
Very well sir I am going to transfer you to the next level up. Cool, I thought, maybe I will get someone with half a brain. Ratty music and announcements. It’s the 3rd inning. M’s 3, A’s 1. A’s run is unearned, some duffus must have made an error.
Hello sir, I understand you have a problem with channel 651-1. Please hold while I check your account. Ratty music and announcements. A’s only get the one run. Felix still going well.
Sir, you are signed up for that channel. We have a discussion about blackouts.
Please push the red button on your DVR to reset it. . Typity,type, typiti, type. 15 minutes. No channel 651-1.
Your equipment is broken, do you want a service call? An ensuing conversation reveals that my warranty has expired and I will be charged for a repair call. I enquire as to why I am charged because they own the equipment, it is leased.
Your equipment is broken, do you want a service call? I enquire as to whether I will be billed when the service guy shows up and determines that the problem is in their mainframe. Yes. Please connect me to your supervisor. Ratty music and announcements.
Hello sir, with regard to your problem we have discovered that we have a problem with HD. We are tracing the problem; it should be repaired in 5 minutes or so. Reading between the lines of her statement I realize that half of Seattle is on the phone to Directv complaining about the lack of channel 651-1 and I realize what that level one supervisor was doing on the other line(s).
Remaining under control, I have a few kind words for their lack of internal communication and the failure of the operators to accept that it might be Directv’s problem and not mine.
Within 5 minutes the game is up on channel 651-1. It’s the 4th inning; I have been on the phone for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Whew!
A message on the screen read “You have not purchased this channel(721)”.
This was the second time in a week that this had occurred, so I knew the drill. I simply had to call the Directv toll free line and (after the obligatory invitation in Spanish to press el numero dos) enter 721 and all would be taken care of enabling my access to the ballgame. Not so.
“Please hold someone will be with you shortly”
I switch to the standard definition channel while trying to ignore the ratty music interspersed with announcements that if I go to www.directv.com all my problems will be solved. The game has started, Ichiro gets a single, Lopez moves him to second on a grounder to the right side.
Hello? How may I help you? After the perfunctory identification prelims, I explain the reason for my call, channel 651-1 is blocked.
Please hold while I check your account. Ratty music and announcements. Mariners have scored a run, I don’t know how.
Sir, you are signed up for that channel, the game must be in blackout. I inform the lady that the game is not blacked out because it is being shown on standard definition and in addition there is a banner running across the bottom of the screen advising me to switch to channel 651-1 for HD. We have a mild argument about whether the game is blacked out.
Please push the red button on your DVR to reset it. In the background I can hear her typing on her computer keyboard. Typity,type, typiti, type.
It takes 15 minutes for the DVR to reset. No channel 651-1.
Please hold while I transfer you to the supervisor. Ratty music and announcements. This operator returns three times to tell me that the supervisor is on another line and will be with me shortly. (Later I will divine why the supervisor is on the other line for so long.) Bottom of the 2nd inning, Felix Hernandez is pitching for the Mariners and doing well. M’s 3, A’s 0.
Hello sir, I understand you have a problem with channel 651-1. The game must be blacked out. We have a mild argument about whether the game is blacked out.
Very well sir I am going to transfer you to the next level up. Cool, I thought, maybe I will get someone with half a brain. Ratty music and announcements. It’s the 3rd inning. M’s 3, A’s 1. A’s run is unearned, some duffus must have made an error.
Hello sir, I understand you have a problem with channel 651-1. Please hold while I check your account. Ratty music and announcements. A’s only get the one run. Felix still going well.
Sir, you are signed up for that channel. We have a discussion about blackouts.
Please push the red button on your DVR to reset it. . Typity,type, typiti, type. 15 minutes. No channel 651-1.
Your equipment is broken, do you want a service call? An ensuing conversation reveals that my warranty has expired and I will be charged for a repair call. I enquire as to why I am charged because they own the equipment, it is leased.
Your equipment is broken, do you want a service call? I enquire as to whether I will be billed when the service guy shows up and determines that the problem is in their mainframe. Yes. Please connect me to your supervisor. Ratty music and announcements.
Hello sir, with regard to your problem we have discovered that we have a problem with HD. We are tracing the problem; it should be repaired in 5 minutes or so. Reading between the lines of her statement I realize that half of Seattle is on the phone to Directv complaining about the lack of channel 651-1 and I realize what that level one supervisor was doing on the other line(s).
Remaining under control, I have a few kind words for their lack of internal communication and the failure of the operators to accept that it might be Directv’s problem and not mine.
Within 5 minutes the game is up on channel 651-1. It’s the 4th inning; I have been on the phone for 1 hour and 15 minutes. Whew!
Comment