Who am I?

[Uncle Cracker]

We have a winner!! Congrats. You will receive 50 attaboys.

Ed

Problem is, I've already got so many awshits here, it'll cancel them out...

[Ed62]

Will you reveal all 9 clues?

Sure thing. You've already seen 3.
#4- I had sandwiches every afternoon.
#5- I was 5 cents short of having enough money.
#6- I went for a long ride.
#7- It had to do with mass transit.
#8- It became political.
#9- My fate is still unknown.
I'll admit that I didn't remember all the words, so I did a Google search. Here's a link to the lyrics: http://www.maj.org/p2005/ThisLand_mta.html

[Ed62]

Problem is, I've already got so many awshits here, it'll cancel them out...

I thought I had 'em all.

Ed

[Uncle Cracker]

I thought I had 'em all.

Ed

No way... A big pile of awshits was all I got in the divorce settlement...