A talented engineer died in a car accident and went up to the pearly gates. Because of a clerical error (yep--happens up there too) he got sent down to ****.
Well, once he arrived there he went to work on the fire and brimstone, horrible liquids and fumes and soforth. Within 2 months he had installed central air with a topnotch filtration system, had diverted the streams of sewage to a wastewater treatment facility, and had made **** into a pretty comfortable place.
Well, the devil was on vacation (on Devil's Island, of course) for awhile, and when he got back he was pretty steamed. He didn't like the changes one little bit. So, he trudged up to heaven to argue with God.
"Hey, God, I know there's a lot we disagree about, but listen--we got a guy who belongs to you. I did some checking, there was a typo, and he got sent to my place by mistake. So, I want you to take him now."
God realized he had one up on Satan, so he said nonchalantly, "Hey, what's done is done. Clerical error or not--once it's written in the Book of Life it can't be changed."
The devil said, "Well, I've had enough of this guy. I'm sending him up here no matter what. In fact, he's on his way already." (He was lying, of course.)
God responded in language he thought the devil might understand, "Well, you send him up here, I'll sue your butt!"
At this the devil smiled slyly for the first time and played his trump card: "Where are you gonna get the lawyers?"
Well, once he arrived there he went to work on the fire and brimstone, horrible liquids and fumes and soforth. Within 2 months he had installed central air with a topnotch filtration system, had diverted the streams of sewage to a wastewater treatment facility, and had made **** into a pretty comfortable place.
Well, the devil was on vacation (on Devil's Island, of course) for awhile, and when he got back he was pretty steamed. He didn't like the changes one little bit. So, he trudged up to heaven to argue with God.
"Hey, God, I know there's a lot we disagree about, but listen--we got a guy who belongs to you. I did some checking, there was a typo, and he got sent to my place by mistake. So, I want you to take him now."
God realized he had one up on Satan, so he said nonchalantly, "Hey, what's done is done. Clerical error or not--once it's written in the Book of Life it can't be changed."
The devil said, "Well, I've had enough of this guy. I'm sending him up here no matter what. In fact, he's on his way already." (He was lying, of course.)
God responded in language he thought the devil might understand, "Well, you send him up here, I'll sue your butt!"
At this the devil smiled slyly for the first time and played his trump card: "Where are you gonna get the lawyers?"