Now let me complicate things

[Ed62]

I have to admit that I kinda set you guys up in the other thread. In the "Tools and friends" thread, I think there were 13 "No way" replies, and 5 "Depends on who they are" replies. Just about what I expected. Now I'll complicate matters. Maybe some things are more important than tools.

The friend who wants to borrow a tool is the guy who just happened to be in the right place when your 12 year old daughter was in jeopardy of being raped last week. He was able to stop this from happening. Now he needs to borrow your most prized tool, which is precisely setup, and he would feel bad if you offered to give it to him. What do you say now? Can you tell him "No"? As much as I don't want to lend my tools out, I couldn't do that even if I expected to see myself repairing and re-setting everything.

Or if your friend was having financial problems, and needed your tool to make money so his home wouldn't go to foreclosure. Again, he would feel bad if you offered the tool, and you were not able to help financially.

Ed

[stav]

If he saved my daughter from being raped, I'd be so greatful that I would be willing to buy the tool for him as a reward.

If he was in that bad of shape financially, he would probably need the tool for quite a while, in which time I would need it. In that case, buy a second and let him use/keep it.

[jAngiel]

That falls into the "depends on who it is" category. If it were me I'd be indebted for life if they helped out one of my kids that way. A planer or table saw can be replaced easily enough, what the girl could have gone through could have scarred for life.

I wouldn't have a problem lending/giving at all, and I'm like most of the others that would originally have said NO WAY.

[cabinetman]

Ed

You can take the "if-then" thing to extremes. Of course there wil be circumstances when conditions outweigh the simplicity of just a tool. After all, on the outset, tools can be replaced as a last resort. There are times in life that money or material things are meaningless.

As for my daughter getting raped, I would feel sorry for the rapist, he has no idea who he's dealing with. She'd kick his a$$ stupid.



YOU HAVEN'T FAILED, YOU JUST HAVEN'T FINISHED

[LarryG]

These hypothetical examples (at least I assume they are hypothetical ...?) are the reason for the existence of the phrase, "Never say never." It's one thing to have a general policy to not loan tools. It's another thing entirely to have the question tied to extenuating circumstances of such an extreme and specific nature.

[gjat]

Let me give you some guidelines. I'm in construction and have heard tons of sob stories, some real. I like my guys and appreciate how they work. Saving your daughter is a nice and humane thing so you owe him a favor. Don't overestimate what he did unless he had to fight off an attacker who had a knife.

My rule is don't commit to doing something without being able to accept the 'worst case' scenario. If you lend your tools, are you willing to accept the loss if he ruins them even by accident? Are you willing to accept the loss if they get stolen from his garage? NEVER lend anything you aren't willing to accept never seeing again. Things happen.

Give him $$ that you can afford to not get paid back as a loan. Be clear about payment terms and accept the fact that you may not get it back. About 90% of the people I lend money to don't pay me back. The 10% that do make it worthwile. When I lend $$ or tools, it's with the seceret expectation that there is a 90% probablity I won't see it again.

[jackellis]

My rule is don't commit to doing something without being able to accept the 'worst case' scenario. If you lend your tools, are you willing to accept the loss if he ruins them even by accident? Are you willing to accept the loss if they get stolen from his garage? NEVER lend anything you aren't willing to accept never seeing again. Things happen.

This is ****ed sensible advice. I've tried to do right be people on a couple of occasions only to get screwed in the end. The guy who asked for 20 bucks at a gas stop and took my address so he could pay me back - never saw a dime. The guy who told a sob story about being a neighbor kid and selling magazine subscriptions so his soccer club could travel abroad to a tournament - turned out he worked for a questionable door-to-door marketing firm and I did get my money back but I was furious over initially being taken for a fool. Or the tenants my wife and I have had in rental properties we owned who came up with new excuses every month for not paying the rent.

Not everyone is out to get you, but you need to "prepare for the worst and hope for the best".

[scorrpio]

Life has no absolutes. If I owe someone a real huge favor, and he needs a tool real bad, I'll...

Use it as a chance to upgrade to a better tool.

[Greg.B]

In this case I would go take my tool for him to use and help him while he uses it to ensure that it gets used correctly.

[HarmsWay]

You got it Greg. I think everyone gets what they want that way (assuming he didn't ask to borrow your prized tool just so he could keep it or sell it).

Bob

[Ed62]

Yeah, those are extreme examples. But there has to be a pivot point where one would say "Yes" or "No". I've even told my own kids "No". Some of them I would lend to, others, not any more. Recently one of them borrowed my thickness planer. It came back acting like someone tried to raise the head without releasing the lock. Now it will move, but there is a definite heavy friction. He doesn't get it any more. But that was my fault. I know how he treats his own tools.

Ed

[MilDoc]

But he wants to move your prized, set up tool. If you can cover it, buy him one. Else, dunno.

[Greg from IL]

Come on ED

I don't post much, but I felt I had to this time.

Ed, He saved your lil girl, that makes him a hero in my book.
Loan him the tool and be proud he's a friend you can count on.

[Ed62]

[QUOTE=Greg from IL;229946]I don't post much, but I felt I had to this time.

Ed, He saved your lil girl, QUOTE]
Well, not actually. My kids are all grown. But if he did, he could have anything I own.

Ed

[Greg from IL]

I'm such a goof sometimes

I thought this was a true story.

Sorry ED

I'll go back to lurking now.